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I love my wife with all my belly. I’d say with all my heart but my belly is way bigger. That thang completes me. My wife brightens my day, eases my frustrations, loosens my anxieties, lightens my loads. She calms me. I adore my wife. When Hollie and I told my family we were getting married, my brother looked at me straight in the eyes and asked a question I shall never forget followed by a statement I will always quote. I include in all my wedding services and premarital counseling meets this question and quote. My brother asked me, “Do you love her?” I responded by saying, With all my heart. Then he got really serious which never happened and he said, “You know, you don’t marry someone you can live with — you marry someone you can’t live without.” Wow. The depth of that statement settled into my soul and has remained for over 24 years of marriage now. “You don’t marry someone you can live with — you marry someone you can’t live without.”

Valentine’s Day is less than a week away from once this devotion will be put in the paper. Marriage is hard! Whoever said marriage was 50/50 lied. Marriage is 100/100 where husband and wife are giving each other there all at all times. We do this because we complete each other. From the very beginning of the human race and throughout the Bible God said for man and woman to become one (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5, Mark 10:8, Ephesians 5:31). From the finances (if you do join accounts be fair and share and if you do separate accounts-don’t split stuff 50/50…instead do percentages so that it is even and fair with what you make) to communication, from time together to time apart…you do what is best for the team—not just for yourself. Real marriage takes hard work and dedication. But, you’re willing to do the work! Why? Because “you don’t marry someone you can live with— you marry someone you can’t live without.”

Now, let’s keep this real OK? Marriage ain’t always ice cream ‘n cake ’n cake. There’s arguing, there’s disagreements, there’s highs and lows. In real marriage, the devil will tell you that someone is better for you. The devil will destroy a marriage with a lot of little digs and before you know it you’re in a hole and feel trapped. Marriage is the union between two imperfect people. No one is perfect…but you can be perfect for each other. “You don’t marry someone you can live with — you marry someone you can’t live without. Go spoil your valentine.

Rev. J. Cameron Bailey is pastor of Kenbridge Christian Church. He can be reached at jamescameronbailey@gmail.com.